From my CSE lesson on Convenience Food – Smash.
It’s a lesson on Convenience Food today – useful to know how to save time for your family and cooking fuel.
Terry, can you read from O level Cookery please?’
This is the bible they must regurgitate for their exam. Supposed to be the truth, but like the bible, it’s not. He stands for this honour.
‘The use of convenience foods has increased rapidly since the day in 1837 when Alfred Bird, a chemist, first marketed the eggless custard powder that he made for his sick wife.’
‘Class – so what did Alfred invent?’
‘Bird’s Custard Miss.’
Yeh! That lumpy, yellow stuff served at school dinners to smother jam roly poly and apple pie
‘Jackie – next please.’
‘The use of convenience foods does not necessarily mean the housewife has lost her skill as a cook. Rather she recognises the opportunity to cut out time spent on frequent shopping expeditions and preparation of ingredients.’
Yeh! It’s that bloody housewife again.
‘Give me examples of convenience foods please.’
I go round the class – jelly cubes, packet and tinned soup, packet cake mix, frozen peas, pizzas and pastry, salad cream, Vesta curries – and our all-time favourite Angel Delight!
‘Today I’m going to make a Cottage Pie from Delia’s How to Cheat at Cooking book.’
I hold the book up for all to see.
‘She uses five convenience foods.’
I read out her recipe
‘I x 15 oz can savoury minced beef, 1 tbs dried minced onions, 1 small green pepper, chopped, ½ teaspoon dried mixed herbs, 1 x 15 oz can Italian tomatoes, drained, 1 packet instant mashed potato, 2 oz grated Cheddar cheese and some butter.
Can you list them?’
They scribble their answers.
‘Lift your hands when you are ready. Oh and Delia doesn’t use metric measures like us. Oz means ounce.’
‘Oooh no,’ says someone at the back. Imagine someone from the dark ages who uses imperial measures. They only know about Delia if their family brings home the London Evening Standard and they read her cookery articles. Her book mostly uses ready-made ingredients. Cheating, she calls it. Doing me out of a job, is my description.
‘Today I’m going to show you how to use a powdered instant potato called Smash which you mix with water or milk. Do you know the song in the advert?’
The back row sings ‘For mash, get Smash’ and someone squawks like a robot.
‘You’re right. In the advert alien robots look down at Earth and laugh at us humans peeling, boiling, and mashing potatoes. They find our old-fashioned method silly compared to using Smash and say humans are ‘Clearly a most primitive people.’
‘Watch how quickly I make this pie compared with the one you are making from real ingredients. Someone time me please.’
In a bowl, I mix Smash with boiling water, and add grated cheese and margarine. In another bowl, I stir canned minced beef, dried onions and herbs together then pack them in a pie dish and cover with canned tomatoes. The Smash potato goes on top, patterned with a fork. When you want to serve, bake in an oven for 30 minutes.
‘How long did that take me Terry?’
‘Ten minutes Miss.’
‘It’s a great way to cook quickly before you get the blackouts at home. But will it taste as nice as the Shepherd’s Pie you’re making?’
They’ve got their aprons on and are ready when I call them round.
‘We’ve been told to save fuel when we cook, to help the country with our energy supplies. For the next few months, you must work in pairs and cook together. You decide who your pair is and share your ingredients but end up with two dishes.
Grrr. You’d think I’d asked the boys to prepare for war.
‘I ain’t working with him.’
‘He can’t cook to save his life.’
The girls quietly go off to their workspaces and start. Peeling and boiling potatoes, frying the mince and onions, stirring in tinned tomatoes, and sharing into two dishes, topped with creamy mashed potatoes. Then into the oven to brown.
‘Well done girls. Clear up please.’
The boys continue to scrap,but I’m not getting involved in their war mongering.
While the pies cook I give them each a tasting spoon to try Delia’s Cottage Pie.
‘Really nice Miss,’ says Terry. ‘Yum’ go the rest. I hope when they get home, theirs is equally delicious, and I have not converted them to use packet food.
Have I taught a mixed message today?
As Cynthia and I clear up for our lunchtime break, some boys come in and ask if they can make mugs of these new Batchelors Cup-a-Soup.
‘It’s really cold out there Miss, and we won’t make a mess.’
They tip the powder into a mug and stir in boiling water with flavours like chicken noodle, tomato and minestrone soup, which look and smell delicious. I think I’ll stock up and replace my usual hurried snack of almonds, glacé cherries and chunks of angelica.
There’s a new world out there of fast food which could change our eating habits forever and dome out of a job.
itaughtthemtocook.com 